{until tomorrow .

hurt@12:09 AM

am i thinking too much?
are they the truth?
i cant tell.
i dont want to.
how did things turn out in this way?
it scares me.
disappointing. hurt. confused.
i shudder at the thought of it.
why must things turn out like this?
why must i be the one?
i thought everything was perfect.
so everything was wishful thinking on my part.
or should it be in the present tense?
am i at fault? i'm the one who brought it upon myself?
is it wrong to be myself? to be my true self?
maybe it is. so maybe it is my fault.
its my fault for not seeing that everything was all a facade.
it was all pretentious. all lies. all acts.
the years and years of fake smiles.
it hurts me.
but hey, thats life. thats reality.
the only person trustworthy enough is yourself.
everything else is deception.
i'm losing hope. i'm losing faith.
in fact, i've lost all the confidence i had.
should i forget about it and move on in life?
the impact might be too fatal to forget.
but certainly i must move on.
its the only solution.
things will never be the same again.

{until tomorrow}